I really want this anxiety to stop.
It's multi-layered right now...
- starting grad school in 2 weeks
- seeing babies babies everywhere and I'm 37 and childless and my partner has just decided that he does not want biological children
- weddings everywhere I fucking turn leaving me with that awful empty hole that society has programmed me to think I am supposed to feel because I have not taken part in the ridiculousness that I loathe and yet still crave with every fucking breath
- still processing Wednesday's therapy session
For now I would like my heart to stop pounding, be able to catch a breath and just relax my way into slumber. I kinda feel like I wanna crawl out of my skin.